Team Theme Song: "Heavy Metal" - Red Rocker
Achievements:
SPIKE! Magazine Champion - Season 2
Chaos Cup Champion - Season 4
| # | Name | Position | MA | ST | AG | AV | Skills | IJ | CMP | TD | INT | CAS | MVP | SPP | Cost |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Aaris Armstrong | Thrower | 6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Accurate, Block, Kick-Off Return, Nerves of Steel, Pass, Sure Hands | 36 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 52 | 150,000 | |
| 2 | Dutch Swift | Runner | 7 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Dauntless | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 90,000 | |
| 3 | Sven "Postman" Quique | Runner | 7 | 4 | 3 | 7 | +1 ST, Block, Catch, Dauntless, Dodge, Side Step, Sure Hands | 1 | 41 | 0 | 3 | 7 | 165 | 220,000 | |
| 4 | Ymir Wrathsmith | Berserker | 5 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Claws, Frenzy, Jump Up, Mighty Blow, Piling On, Pro, Tackle, Wrestle | -1 MA | 0 | 7 | 0 | 47 | 3 | 130 | 190,000 |
| 5 | Grogg Yaksmak | Berserker | 6 | 3 | 4 | 7 | +1 AG, Block, Frenzy, Jump Up | 0 | 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 6 | 130,000 | |
| 6 | Mars | Ulfwerener | 6 | 4 | 2 | 8 | Block, Frenzy, Juggernaut, Stand Firm, Strip Ball | 0 | 2 | 0 | 16 | 4 | 58 | 190,000 | |
| 7 | Cerberus | Ulfwerener | 6 | 4 | 2 | 8 | Block, Frenzy | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 1 | 11 | 130,000 | |
| 8 | Jager | Snow troll | 5 | 5 | 1 | 8 | Block, Claws, Disturbing Presence, Frenzy, Loner, Mighty Blow, Multiple Block, Team Player, Wild Animal | 0 | 0 | 0 | 23 | 2 | 56 | 240,000 | |
| 9 | Mlark Lillhammer | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Tackle | N | 0 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 13 | 70,000 |
| 10 | Mlorn Hansel | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Strip Ball, Tackle | 1 | 3 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 22 | 90,000 | |
| 11 | Jergan Rope | Lineman | 5 | 4 | 3 | 7 | +1 ST, Block, Tackle | N,-1 MA,N | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 21 | 120,000 |
| 13 | Jumer Gorgan | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block, Strip Ball | N | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 7 | 70,000 |
| 14 | Jjorlok Fajr | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 7 | Block | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 50,000 | |
| 15 | Glasgow Norj | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 4 | 7 | +1 AG, Block | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 0 | 8 | 90,000 | |
| 16 | Klie Jorgn | Lineman | 6 | 4 | 3 | 7 | +1 ST, Block, Guard | 0 | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 16 | 130,000 | |
| Team Name: | Storm Of Mjolnir | Player Count: 15 | Rerolls: | 6 X 60,000 = | 360,000 | ||||||||||
| Race: | Norse | Fan Factor: | 12 X 10,000 = | 120,000 | |||||||||||
| Treasury: | 0 | |
Creedo: "Keep the mead cold, the women hot, and the Bloodbowl bloody!" Team Theme Song: "Heavy Metal" - Red Rocker Achievements: SPIKE! Magazine Champion - Season 2 Chaos Cup Champion - Season 4 |
Assistant Coaches: | 10 X 10,000 = | 100,000 | |||||||||
| Coach: | gensix4 | Cheerleaders: | 3 X 10,000 = | 30,000 | |||||||||||
| Division: | Da Souf | Apothecary: | 1 X 50,000 = | 50,000 | |||||||||||
| Overall Record (W-L-T): | 25 - 10 - 10 | 0.667 | Team Value: | 2,620,000 | |||||||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 03-24-2010 | The Shooting Starbucks | 1 - 2 | 1 - 3 | 35,000 | Season 5 | Yes |
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Winnings: 40,000 Inducements: 0 ***** First half: First turn puts the Storm down 2 casualties. Second turn, defensive passer dies. Third turn Starbucks score, o wait, not they don’t. Their fastest guy stands by the goal line to stall the game. Second half: Storm starts with the ball, and Sven is struck by the wizard. The ball comes out Starbucks HM pass the ball downfield but can’t score on the Storm’s defence. So the ball gets cloned, the Starbucks end up on the wrong side of the dice. Storm scores. But Sven is in the knock out box (the rest of the game it turns out.) Starbucks get the ball and fight down the pitch. They break through the defence and score. O wait, they don’t score, they stall the game again. Bad dice on miserable GFI attemps all game, good casualties against the Norse, and shadey tactics at best, Storm loses. |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 03-12-2010 | Sisters of the Twilight | 2 - 1 | 3 - 1 | 40,000 | Season 5 | Yes |
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Winnings: 60,000 Inducements: 0 ***** Sven “Postman” Quique is on his way to becoming a legend by the end of the season. ‘Nough said..... |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 02-21-2010 | Dark Blessings | 2 - 0 | 0 - 0 | 4,000 | Season 5 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 10,000 Inducements: 0 |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 02-20-2010 | The Weepin' Wompers | 4 - 3 | 7 - 1 | 27,000 | Season 5 | Yes |
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Winnings: 80,000 Inducements: 0 ***** The Wompers rolled up to the pitch with their standard cart full of gold in inducements. The venues that have been hosting the boys from Nittersleigh have been spending a fortune on paying other teams to play them. The younger teams area all trying to grab one of the major tournaments being held, and to do so they have to face the Storm. *** post game *** “Well those Wompers can put some points on the board. Even with the defence that the Storm brings to the pitch, we could only hold them to 3 touchdowns. That 1 turn score guy was a menace to us.” “Yes Jergan, but it shows that even when and underdog tries to win, there is always hope. They had 2 or 3 chances to make this a tie game, or possibly pull off a win. But the point was they tried. Sure they called down the lightning on Ymir, we expect that every game now. But they kept in it and pulled their weight. They didn’t come in with some cow chip on their shoulder, they came to win.” “Coach, not to change the subject, but Jager has been with us now for 5 seasons, since the beginning. He has been coming into his own finally and making some bigs plays for the team. The boys and I think he deserves to have full teammate status, and not be considered a loner any more. What do ya say?” “Jergan, I’ve been considering this for 2 seasons now, and I think its time. I’ll get the paperwork ready and make him an offer of full teammate status. We’re defeinitly going into the Dungeanbowl this year. Good idea.” |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 02-13-2010 | Death Squad | 2 - 0 | 6 - 3 | 30,000 | Season 5 | Yes |
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Winnings: 80,000 Inducements: 0 ***** A wizard, bone doctor, and a full hand of cards. 1.2 million in inducements against the Storm. Those really expnsive cards are worth their weight in gold, but the Storm are a tempest that won’t be turned denied. Good luck big bird on the stiched up body. Sorry about all the dead guys, but guess that’s what can happen with necromantics. |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 01-29-2010 | Chicken & Chumplin's | 2 - 1 | 1 - 3 | 28,000 | Season 5 | Yes |
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Winnings: 80,000 Inducements: 0 ***** Chumplin’s with a plan? Much more like a confused act of desperation. Can’t hang with the big dogs? Feel free to get off the porch at any time little doggies. The Storm too big and bad for the league? ‘Dems the breaks kiddies. Thanks for the game, and don’t worry, the Storm will be around when the Chumplin’s decide to grow a pair… Who knows, maybe they can call in their big brothers to lend them a hand… ;)- |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 01-23-2010 | Oath Breakers | 3 - 1 | 5 - 3 | 22,000 | Season 5 | Yes |
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Winnings: 140,000 Inducements: 0 ***** Good game against the Oath Breakers. 1 game closer to the finish line. Coaching staff just got a bit brighter with Aden Swift retiring after a long and illustrious career, starting way back in season 1 with the Storm. His skill on the field will be missed, but his skill on staff is quite welcomed! |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 01-02-2010 | Steeltown Stompers | 2 - 2 | 4 - 5 | 40,000 | Season 5 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 50,000 Inducements: 0 ***** Always good to match up against some humans. Good job Stompers! |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 08-23-2009 | Steeltown Renegades | 2 - 1 | 3 - 0 | 66,000 | Chaos Cup 2009 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 140,000 Inducements: 0 ***** ?Welcome back to the Steeltown Slaughterhouse, home of the Renegades. For NBC (Nuffle Broadcasting Corp.), I?m Sven Sportsmith bringing to you this year?s Chaos Cup Championship matchup between the Steeltown Renegades and the Storm of Mjolnir. These two teams share a varied and assorted past, and when it comes to the playoffs, well there is only one story to be covered, the Renegades clobbering the Storm.? ?Well we?ve seen some interesting activity on the pitch in the pregame already with some near brawls erupting between the two teams, mostly instigated between Gavin ?Mean? Green and the mighty ulfwerener Mars. Of course Ogie and his counterpart Jager also have been eyeballing each other, sizing up the bulky mass that each bring to the pitch. But by far the most interesting sight is the small dark cloud that keeps hovering over the east end of the practice field where the Storm?s league leading hitter is sparing, or rather, slaughtering, 3 practice sleds.? *** ?The Renegades have won the coin toss and have chosen to receive the ball first. There?s the kick, and as the hometown fans cheer on their team, the ball goes way back into the corner of the pitch. What a kick! The Renegades go to dig out the ball and, what?s this, it looks like they are having some ball handling issues, Ooooo, and with that last flub the ball is back on the pitch. Looks like an ominous start for the Renegades, let?s see if they can shake it off. The Storm move to the backfield to put pressure on the ball, and there go the Renegades. Picking up the ball, scooting it over towards the sideline, and caging up in the widezone to drive down the pitch. The Storm go to counter and, Oooooooo!!!! Gavin Green takes Mars and shoves him into the hometown crowd!!! Lookslike that pregame mouthing has brought itself onto the pitch of this rivalry. But wait, instead of getting smashed and broken, it looks like Mars is terrorizing the crowd! Look at that sportsfans! Mars is ripping the hometown fans to shreds on the jumbotron camras!!!? ?With getting surfed and ?Mean? Green leaving himself open after the hit, a couple of norsemen maneuver their way over to the Renegade and a dark cloud floats over as Ymir ?Deathdealer? Wrathsmith pulls the cork and dumps out a can of wooparse on the Renegade. Ouch, he?s gonna feel that in the morning?.? ?While the Storm take care in making the Renegades suffer a little on the sideline, the Renegades maneuver the ball to center field and run the ball into the endzone. Touchdown?..Renegades!!!!? *** ?The Renegades have set their defense, and now the Storm get into position. Jager lines up against the Renedages front line, and it looks like steam is rising off of his frozen tundra hide. The Renegades kick the ball and, wait, it looks like the weather is changing? Ahhh, its just that dark cloud crossing the field as Ymir gets into position. The ball comes down and Jager springs out of his 3 point stance and takes ?Brute Force? Foster and Dropper Brock in his monstrous paws and smashed their heads together?Ooooo, double knockout!!!! I don?t think those Renegades are going to forget Jager for a long while? And Ooooo, three goes Ymir blitzing a Renegade. He drives his fist into his victim and, eewwwww, with that amount of blood gushing out of that Renegade, he isn?t coming back any time soon?. Man, it seems like Ymir is touch by the Bloodbowl gods lately. Everything he hits goes into the casualty box it seems like.? ?And Aaris Armstrong has the ball. Aaris is the original thrower for the Storm, and he?s feed a lot of footballs into the waiting arms of Sven Quique, but not tonight as Sven is sitting this one out with a sore shoulder. There go the Storm caging down the field around Aden Swift, getting ready for the score. The Renegades move into position to spoil the score and, wait, what?s this, with the Renegades swarming Swift, the veteran thrower looks like he?s gripped with indecision. What?s this, he tucks the ball and runs into the cage himself like he?s going to take the ball into the endzone. In response the tighten the noose around the Storm with Ogie and ?Papa? Thorson moving in to choke off the lane to the endzone. As the final second tick away for the first half, Armstrong signals for Jager to open a hole for him to run through, but Jager just yells and rips up huge chucks of sod, flinging them in the air, the Head Coach yells at him from the sideline to snap out of it, and just for a moment the red faded from Jager?s eyes. But with Carl ?BOA? Dobber taunting the big giant, Jager falls back ino his rant. Seeing he is out of luck with his receiver, and his blitzer, Aden lets out a howl, puts his head down, his arm out, and runs full tilt at the gap between Ogie and Thorson. He dodges between them, he dodges through them, he dodges away from them. Into the endzone and?.touchdown!!!! Unbelievable. He loked like a skink running through the gaps in that defense!!!? *** ?Second half and the Storm are set to receive the ball. The 60k + fans are really roaring and the crowd is going crazy at this 1-1 tie leading into the second half. And there?s the kick, but wait, what?s this, the crowd rushes onto the pitch and a riot has broken out near the 50 yard line! The refs are quick to break it up though, and much to the displeasure of the howetown fans, the game goes on in quick manner.? ?As the pitch comes back under ?control?, Armstrong again grabs the ball and runs towards the Storm?s cage. He gets knocked around, and out pops the ball. But here comes Krak Yaksmak circling around and drives the Renegades into the loose ball, bouncing it towards Aden Swift. The Storm reform a running cage down the pitch, and Aden dashes to the forefront. The Renegades make a try at breeching the cage and boxing up Swift, but the Storm circle back around and Ymir drives the Renegades away from Swift. With an open hole, Swift sprints down the pitch, TOUCHDOWN!!!!! The Storm of Mjolnir take the lead!!!!? *** ?With 3 minutes left in the half, the Storm set their defense and wait for the Renegades to take position. The Storm are spreading out wide to slow down the speed of the Renegades and win this match up in regulation time. The Renegades have taken their position, and there?s the kick. But wait, it looks like those angry houlagans who tried to get the riot going have come back on the pitch and are, what, bagging and tagging the referee?!?!?!?! They?re dragging him back into the stands and o man, is he getting pummeled. Looks like our gladiators have free reign to cut loose on each other this last drive.? ?And the Renegades get the ball and start to drive up the side. The Storm adjust their defense and oooo?. Looks like the ball handling woes have come back to the Renegades in the backfield, wasting valuable time. The Storm take advantage of the bloopers and let loose on the receivers downfield. Yaksmak and Grendel wail on Kayne Roberts and his blitzer escort. Ooooo man, they let out some aggression old school style and both of the receivers downfield get sent to the casualty box. That hit on Roberts looked especially bad, as the stretcher boys are trying to pick up some tendons that are laying on the ground?.? ?As the Renegades regroup and get the ball moving again, looking downfield, there?s no one to take them in for a score. The only thing they see are Ogie with a bunch of linemen, and the Storm of Mjolnir?s defense locking up the endzone for good. The game horn goes off, signaling the end of regulation play. 2-1 Storm of Mjolnir!!!! The boys from Nittersleigh have pulled out the win and kicked the playoff curse against the Renegades!!!!? *** ?And there?s the commissioner now, awarding the Storm of Mjolnir the Chaos Cup. This makes these norsemen the most award winning Bloodbowl team in the league, now possessing both the SPIKE! Award and the Chaos Cup. Well, hats off to the Storm, they took a beating to get here, and never lost hope. Just look at the faces of those Vikings as, wooooo, wait a minute!?!?! What is going on with Ymir Wrathsmith??!??!?!! That dark cloud that seemed to have been following him is now all around him. The rest of the players are all moving away as scream, howls, and maniacal laughter are all resounding from the cloud. But they don?t sound like they are coming from Ymir, they sound like they are coming from the cloud itself!!! And look over there in the crowd?! There?s a group of hooded fans all chanting and motioning to the cloud. This must be the Chaos Cup ritual for the winners where they are granted boons from the Chaos gods!!!! An it would appear that Ymir is the sole recipient of the attention this year? Ooo wait, the cloud is coming up, the fog is lifting, and there is Ymir. By Nuffle?s skirts?!?!?!? Ymir has???.? +++ transmission ended +++ |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 08-09-2009 | Legion of DOOM | 3 - 1 | 6 - 4 | 70,000 | Chaos Cup 2009 | Yes |
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Winnings: 140,000 Inducements: 0 ***** “Welcome back sports fans, this is Sven Sportsmith coming to you with the post game of a brutal and nailbiting clash of the necromantic Legion of DOOM, and the norsemen from Nittersleigh, the mighty Storm of Mjolnir. “Everyone and their brother showed up to this match, including the crazy Chaos god of change, Tzeench himself!!! I guess he just had to see for himself what this insane crowd of 70,000 fans came out for. “Well, I can tell you none were disappointed at the match up as the most anticipated brawl of the Chaos Cup turned itself loose on the pitch. “The stats for the Legion were imrpessive, but in the end the experience of the Storm and the amazing amount of skills these norsemen bring to the pitch were too much for the junior team of DOOM. League leading scorer and MVP Sven Quique added to his his dominance with another touchdown, and for the 5th time claming the MVP of the match up!!! And as for hitting, the towering snow troll Jager crushed a few necro’s out there tonight, howling and roaring as he went, but not to be outdone, the dark mask deathdealer of Ymir Wrathsmith tacked on 3 more casualties, solidifying his CIBBL claim to faim as the most brutal of all Bloodbowl players, ever!!! He sits atop the pile of dead and injured with a fearsome 36 casualties, and the bookies are already placing odds on him breaking the 40 casualty mark before the Chaos Cup is finished!!! “I got to hand it to the boys from Nittersleigh, they fought hard to get to the finals, even burning through 3 apothicaries in attempts to resurect a veteran lineman, and keep Sven Quique awake after a hard punch to the back of the head. It may be a really tough road to the top to go through the Premier team in the Renegades. These two teams have a history of brutality and skull crushing when they meet on the oposite sides of the pitch, and the Renegades have come up on top 2 of the last 2 match ups, in play off challenges. “Will the Storm shake the play off curse against the Steeltown Renegades? Can the Storm win on the big field with their MVP on the sidelines? We shall see sportsfans. For NBC (Nuffle Broadcasting Corp.), I’m Sven Sportsmith reminding you to keep the mead cold, the women hot, and the Bloodbowl bloody!!!. |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 07-11-2009 | Dark Blessings | 3 - 2 | 5 - 7 | 35,000 | Chaos Cup 2009 | Yes |
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Winnings: 70,000 Inducements: 0 ***** Welcome back sports fans to the Nittersleigh Battlegrounds, where the first quarter final game of the Chaos Cup is taking place. I’m Sven Sportsmith with NBC (Nuffle Broadcasting Corp.), and I’ll be taking you through the play by play of what is sure to be a bloody and electrifying clash. With the a rookie darkhorse Chaos team coming into the Cup trying to gain favor of the gods of Chaos, the Storm have thrown down the gauntlet in front of them and outright challenged the gods of Chaos to the demise of Dark Blessings. The 4 year veteran team defintely have their work cut out for them as this rookie team has some steep incentives coming to them for stepping onto the pitch.” “And here some the wagons full of crowns now. Fully loaded with a million crowns, just waiting to be spent on dirty tricks, magic cards, and plenty of other talents to be had. But wait, the carts didn’t even stop! It looks as if the head coach of Dark Blessings has already made his been and spent all the crowns. Well, let’s see what the damage was.” “Coach, coach, so let me be the first to welcome you to the Chaos Cup quarter finals. I’m Sven Sports.,.,.,,.” “I know who you are Sportsmith, and you aren’t the first. So ask your questions and let’s be done with this. I have rituals to perform before my minions hit the pitch, and you are wasting my time.” “Well, uh, alrighty then. We saw the gold wagons roll on by so we assume you already had it spent. Can you share with our viewers what your strategy was for the crowns that came to you? We hear there was about a million of the beauties!” “The inducements were all spent. If you look behind me you will see the best mercenaries and apothicaries money can buy. Plus we have spent some of it on additional training over the past few days, and this card right here is the linchpin to the entire match up. Just watch....” As the head coach of Dark Blessings pulled the card from the dark velvet bad, he threw it up in the air and as it soared upwards, the paper of the card began to bleed and tranform into a fleshy wigned beast. The flying spawn circled around in the air and as the head coach pointed his finger towards the Storm’s end of the pitch, the spawn let out a blood curling screech and dove towards the Storm’s work out area. If flew fast and steep and as flew it grew bigger! It finally crossed the pitch and swooped down into the midst of the Storm. When it came back up it was 10 times its original size, and in its claws it held the struggling form of Jager the snow troll. It flew straight up and just as it almost got to the low mist above the pitch, it dropped the snow troll who plummeted to the pitch and landed in a grotesque crash, caving in mid center field. “Holy crap!” exclaimed Sportsmith. “Quite the contrary Sportsmith, desperate times call for desperate measures. The unholy favor of our gods are with us. Your NBC has reported that the gods of Chaos have not taken special interest in this match, but I know for a fact that they have. You have wasted enough of my time, now leave me alone wilst we prepare for this match.” “Well sports fans, straight from the jacka...I mean horse’s mouth! Chaos is here, and this match is bloody before it even started. I’d say Khorne is the sponser, but I guess we’ll see.” As the teams took the pitch, it was obvious that both could hardly see the ball for the heat of bloodlust that filled the stadium. It was practically all consuming. The bloodlust radiated from all of the players, manifesting in a heat that sweltering. “Well there goes the two teams taking up there sides of the gridiron. I haven’t seen as much bloodlust in the faces of these gladiators since the famed season 3 game between these boys from Nittersleigh and the M&M;ogres. 14 warriors left the pitch that day, and if Khorne is watching, we may get more of the same again.” “And here we go with the Storm of Mjolnir set to recieve the ball. Interesting that Ymir has taken to the pitch in that fearsome helmet of his. He certainly does look like he can live up to that Deathdealer nickname he has earned. And interestingly enough, he has taken the center position normally held by Jager, straight across from the Minotaur!! But what’s this, a blitz from the Chaos team! They repositioned themselves, and position a chaos warrior under the ball. Ooooooo...!!! and he catches it!!! The Storm isn’t going respond well to that.” “And there’s the first hit with Mars attacking the chaos warrior and sending him to the locker room. The second hit puts another chaos warrior on his back. As if on cue, Klie and Krakow take guard positions next to the minotaur and Ymir, Ooooooo...., Ymir brought that wicked axe of his down into the minotaur’s skull. He’ll be out for the game at least after that one!!! Guess the gifts of chaos with that desperate card don’t come without reprocusions.” ### “Welcome back sportsfans to the halftime show. I’m Sven Sportsmith and we have completed the eight turns of the first half, and with that said, it has been a dusy!!! We have had a casualty for each of the eight turns, and thre apothacaries have taken to the pitch to care for the injured. This heat hasn’t come into effect much, but come second half I can’t see how the teams can ignore it any more because its unbearable now. The blood stains all over the pitch seem to make it worse, and there is so much blood out there the Nittersleigh Battlegrounds field crew are getting extra amounts of sand and moss to soak this stuff up! We’ll let the field-casters take care of the second half broadcasting and we’ll see you at the end of regulation!” ### “Holy cow sportsfans!!! We have definetly one fo the most brutal game on record here, and its still going!!! After 16 turns of regulation, the Storm and Chaos team haven’t had enough. They are all tied up at 2, and are going into overtime!!!” “And there’s the coin toss. Ewwwwww..... it came up with the chaos sign, the Dark Blessing coach has chosen to recieve. As the teams take to their sides, one of the Storm’s coaching staff holds up the game coin and starts going nuts. What’s this...? The coin has chaos markings on both sides!?!?! What the.... And there’s the referee coming over, and.... what the… unholy cow!?!?! He’s ejecting the assistant coach for interupting game play..?!?!?! Folks this Chaos Cup quarter final game is really chaotic!” “Well, the refs get the teams back to the game, and they line up for the sudden death drive. The casualties and heat have really taken their toll on these teams, with only 9 players lining up for Dark Blessings, and 7 of the Storm able to take formation. And there’s the kick! Dark Blessing has the ball in had and run right up the middle with a tight cage. The Storm manuver for a strong safety position with Sven, Mars, and Ymir holding a tight formation, but what’s this..?!?!?!?! Aden Swift gets up off his back from a brutal block, and leaps over the cage to hit the ball carrier!!! Holy cow sportsfans!?!??!! The ball pops out and it comes down between the outstreched hands of every chaos player in the cage to the arms fo Aden Swift!!! The Storm of Mjolnir has the ball!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” “Dark Blessings takes it shots and piles on top of Aden Swift. We can’t see him folks. The pile is too...wait...wait… take a look at camra 4!!! There he is sportsfans!!! Aden Swift has managed to get out of the cage of chaos and is running down the pitch with the ball!!! The Storm takes up defensive positions to give Aden some distance, but Ooooo, one of the beastmen breaks free and is blitzing after Aden. He’s putting those horns down and .... Ooooooo ... Ewwwww .... looks like he put the horns down too far and tripped over them in his last push to get to Swift!!! Aden is in the open and gets to the endzone to put the Storm on top!!!! What a contest pf strength and staying power!!!” “I cna’t say enough about this match folks!!! It had chaos written all over it, whether it be from those crazy gods or from the craziness of this tourny, it was bloody, crazy, and a nailbiter!!! Everything you want from the playoffs.” “For NBC (Nuffle Broadcasting Corp.) this is Sven Sportsmith saying, keep the mead cold, the women hot, and the Bloodbowl bloody!!!” |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 07-10-2009 | The Weepin' Wompers | 4 - 0 | 7 - 0 | 29,000 | Chaos Cup 2009 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 60,000 Inducements: 0 ***** “What are those carraiges pulling up coach? They are eighted down like they are carrying boulders or something.” “Jergan, thos two carragies are carrying the gold that is being shelled out to this Wood Elf team in order for them to play us. A million crowns I’d suspect, maybe more.” “These woodies are in for a real treat I think. They get to see Sven run the ball through their lines in for a score. By the way, anyone see Sven?” “Last I saw of him he was grabbing a few pints of mead and heading to the red light district of the caravan. There were a couple of ladies that seemed to have caught his eye.” “Well as long as he shakes it off before the kick off, we’ll be just fine.” As the Storm walked onto the pitch and met face to face with the rookie Wompers, Ymir gritted his teeth and started to growl. The captain of the Wompers looked to one of the wardancers, and shook his head. “This guy thinks he’s one of the ulfwerners on the team. Does he think he can scare us with his beserker antics? Has he seen all the tricks we have up our sleeves with the gold that’s getting thrown at us to step onto the pitch with him? Next thing you know, this whole team is going to think that they can control the weather to boot! These guys are diluted...!!!” As if on queue with the last slander parting the lips of the Wompers’ team captain, the clouds rolled in and the rain came pouring down, instantly drenching the pitch. Across the pitch the growling beserker let out a fiersome howl and started yelling at the unsuspecting wood elves. “There’s a Storm coming woodies! And it will lay waste to anyone who stands before it...!!!” |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 06-28-2009 | Sisters of the Twilight | 3 - 2 | 5 - 4 | 34,000 | Season 4 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 70,000 Inducements: 0 ***** The team all hundled around the kegs at the mead tent after the match up with the lizzies. Double headers in Bloodbowl are not for the weak of heart and the Storm needed some refreshments between the battles. “That was some great dodging Aden. Haven’t seen anything like that out of you since season 2!” “What ever Sven, you pasty SOB! You aren’t the only one around here that can run the ball into the endzone. Just because you do it better than anyone in the league, doesn’t mean you are the ONLY one that can do it...” “I’ll drink to that!!! Always liked you Aden, tellin’ me how it is, plain and simple.” “Well, can’t stay comfortable in that shadow of yours, I got to get back in the game. Speaking of game, anyone figure out what the next match up is for the second game?” “Wooohoooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We just got our opponent’s team card and it looks like its filled with wood elves!” “ELVES......... I hate elves… Those ball groping fairies piss me off to no end. Can’t even throw a freakin’ block they are so consumed with handlin’ the ball...” “Well Ymir, your foul attitude may get a little more foul for this match up. Looks like they have an upity elf that thinks he’s an enforcer. Some dancing fool that likes to sneak up behind opponents and knock them to the ground and beat on them while no one is looking. And the best part about it, this enforcer is a chick!!!” “Are you fraggin’ crappin’ me?!?!?!?! A biatch elf that thinks she can hang with the likes of me!?!?!? I’ll tare her throat out and use her head as a ball on the pitch! This game doesn’t have enough room for chicks that hit on the pitch. We’re gonna have to take care of that the ole fashion way and bludgen them until they cry!!!” “Krakow, Jergan, Mlorn, Krak, get over here. I want every tackler we got on the pitch so we can make sure we are all one the same page when it comes to posting up on these fairies...” |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 06-28-2009 | Chumpster's Chumps | 2 - 2 | 4 - 2 | 28,000 | Season 4 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 30,000 Inducements: 0 ***** “Lizards!?!?! This isn’t that underhanded crumb of a lizzy team that fowled us 6 times in the Spike! tournament is it?” “Naw, that team went up to the Premier League after they found out we were staying down here in the trenches. This lizard team is one of the new upstarts that has come into CIBBL this season. They seem to favor building up their smaller lizards though.” All at once, Jager let out a howl and roar. Mars and Grendel followed suit, and the three kept going as if they were bellowing out a song or something. “What’s gotten into the beasts?! Never heard them go off making noise like that before. Kind of eirie....” Ymir joined in the howling, acting like the beserked animal that he had been on the pitch lately. “Now Ymir is caught up in this ruckous too. What the heck is going on?” “It’s the howl of the North Winds.” interjected Aden. “It is a time honoured tradition of the warriors of the Norse to let out howls of war when they meet up with a foe of greater feats of strength then their own.” “Stronger than us? Are you nuts! This is the Storm of Mjolnir we are speaking of! Hammer of the Thor, Heralds of the Northlands.” “They howl of the raw strength, not skill and prowess. The strength of the saurus are plentiful, and the big lizard is as strong as the mighty Ogie.” “Yes, but that is half of this team’s story. The other half is of weak and fragile lizards, that cower under in the shadows of the bigger lizards. That is where we will take the teeth from this beast. That is where we will crush them......” |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 06-20-2009 | Ol' Mcdonald's WARCOWS | 2 - 0 | 8 - 1 | 31,000 | Season 4 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 50,000 Inducements: 0 ***** The Storm were spending time being boisterous in their drinking and eating at the mead hall. The winter and spring had been long and cold and the Nitterslegih Battlegrounds were well into their thaw for the summer. As the boys lost themselves in their ale, a small halfling courier entered the mead hall and climb up onto the bar. “Ahhhhemmm..... TO the Storm of Mjolnir, reigning Spike! Cup champions and first among all teams fro the north lands. The mighty Warcows from the woods have requesed your presence for a mighty game of Bloodbowl so that they may test their mettle and show their prowess as a team among champions!!!” As the halfling’s announcement stop, the mead hall became dead quiet. Not a norseman stirred. They all looked at each other in disbelief. Finally the Armstrong brothers looked at each, and started to laugh. As if on cue, the entire hall errupted in laughter. The halfling’s face became red and as he looked around all of the norse were doubled over laughing. “What is so funny?!?! You have been challenge Storm of Mjolnir by the mighty Warcows! Have you no show of respect? Are you so drunk and content in your revelry in the north that a team as dangerous as the Warcows scares you into insanity....” As the last word fell from the halflings lips, Ymir leapt from his barstool and grabbed the little messenger by the throat. “You dare to call into question the authority of this team in their own lodge? You are either ignorant of the ways of the norse, or brash on foolish half pint!!! If this “call to battle” from the wood elf team is as you say, I would say that both you and these Warcows are a little of both.” Across the room Jager stood up from his rock and put down his keg of mead. He let out a blood curling hwol and then stooped down with his moth open, pointing to the gapping opening that lay between his feirsome teeth. “Looks like this just isn’t your day midget… You can be comforted that the Storm of Mjolnir will take this message and wriek havoc and destruction upon your masters of the woods. Now, you can serve us in one last task.... Feed our snow troll!!!!” And with that Ymir hurled the halfling across the room and into the waiting maw of the snow troll Jager. “Looks like we have some pointy eared upstarts to go school!!! Take in your last tankard boys, because we are leaving the tundra and heading for the woods!!!” And with that, the Storm rolled out and readied themselves to reign down the thunder..... |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 12-06-2008 | Anger Management | 0 - 2 | 0 - 3 | 36,000 | Blood Bowl 2008 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 40,000 Inducements: 0 ***** Sorry couldn’t give you a better game Caretaker. I’ll have to shake that curse sometime. |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 11-15-2008 | Treehuggers | 2 - 2 | 4 - 2 | 26,000 | Season 3 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 60,000 Inducements: 0 ***** Hitem’ Hitem’ Hitem’!!!!!! |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 11-15-2008 | Smeenge's Pals | 2 - 2 | 1 - 3 | 30,000 | Season 3 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 60,000 Inducements: 0 |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 11-14-2008 | M & M's | 2 - 0 | 7 - 7 | 24,000 | Season 3 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 60,000 Inducements: 0 ***** “This is Sven Sportsmith with the NBC (Nuffle Broadcasting Corp) coming to you live from the frozen Nittersleigh Battlegrounds, home turf of the Spike! Magazine Tournament winners, The Storm of Mjolnir. In a cross divisional match up, the Storm of Mjolnir have put enough incentives down to draw the titans of the M&M;’s ogre team. We are sure to see a battle of giants of the M&M;’s trading blows with the battle hardened men of the Storm. “As the pregame horn sounded for each team to take to the pitch, the Storm left their traditional side of the pitch and as they walked out, saw something as is sure to make the highlight reels of eveyone camra broadcast this weekend. The snotlings were all wearing snow suits, and the ogres all had on oversizes mittens on their hands and ear muffs! What ever their equipment coach was thinking, he was determined to keep his team warm through the match! “As the rest of the team erupted in laughter, the feared snow troll Jager let loose a howling roar that made the home crowd errupt with cheers and howls of their own. When asked about Jager’s state of mind before the game, coach handler Bjorg Lillhammer responded ‘We’ve been withholding portions of Jager’s meals to make him mean and hungery for this match up. A little more inspiration to eat the little snotlings as they scramble around the pitch.’ With the Storm winning the coin toss, the first half began. Play began as all the sportcasters predicted, hard hitting. Blow after blow came from the Storm, and the M&M;’s looked to be set back on their heels. But quickly the ogres of the M&M;’s moved back into position and dealt their own foul blows to the norse men. The norse were going down unusually easily, and practically every time the giant ogres drove the norse men to the ground, their armor (although not normally know for its resiliance) was failing much more than normal. Up one to nothing at the half, the Storm regrouped and licked their wounds. ‘We’ve been beating the crap out of these guys, but they are hitting like a ton of bricks coach. We are down both our beserkers and one of the wolves! As Jorge Rockstomp loocked down at his armor, he noticed some unusual indentions. ‘What the heck is this? Fists couldn’t have done this coach! The equipment coach of the Storm took a closer look at Jorg’s armor and a snearing smile came over his face. ‘Next time you knock one of these big guys to the ground, rip off one of those huge mittens and see what you find. So as the Storm norse men took the pitch for the second half, they lined up and after taking some hits from the brutes, the several of the norse men gathered around the giant Donk Schlong and drove him to the ground. As Mars ripped off the titan’s mittens with his jaws, the rest of the crowd gasped as the ogre was brandishing a huge set of knuckle guards meant to smach rocks in quaries! The referee immediately blew the whistle on the secret weapons that the entire cast of titans were concealing underneath their cold weather mittens. The ogres however didn’t seem to care at all, and kept on playing the game! Unable (or unwilling) to stop the cast of ogres on the M&M;’s, the referee’s went back to the sidelines and let the game play on. “Wild ride from the Battlegrounds folks. 14 casualties and with the cold wind up here, the weather seemed to change every time the teams lined up. I’ll say one thing for these beasts from the M&M;’s, they can hit with the best of them, and if they can somehow handle the ball better, they are definitely a team to be reckoned in the seasons to come! For NBC (Nuffle Broadcasting Corp) and Spike! Magazine, this is Sven Sportsmith coming to you from the Nittersleigh Battle grounds reminding you to keep the mead cold, the women hot, and the BloodBowl bloody!!! |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 11-01-2008 | Sotek's Specails | 1 - 2 | 1 - 1 | 29,000 | Season 3 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 40,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 10-28-2008 | Anger Management | 1 - 1 | 2 - 3 | 31,000 | Season 3 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 50,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 10-09-2008 | Smeenge's Pals | 2 - 2 | 0 - 3 | 31,000 | Season 3 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 30,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 08-17-2008 | Roadkill | 2 - 1 | 7 - 1 | 68,000 | Spike Cup 2008 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 120,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 08-17-2008 | Aces High | 3 - 2 | 3 - 6 | 58,000 | Spike Cup 2008 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 130,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 08-17-2008 | Sotek's Specails | 2 - 0 | 3 - 0 | 30,000 | Spike Cup 2008 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 50,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 06-22-2008 | Anger Management | 2 - 1 | 2 - 3 | 27,000 | Season 2 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 70,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
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| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 06-04-2008 | Steeltown Renegades | 1 - 2 | 0 - 3 | 22,000 | Season 2 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 30,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 05-17-2008 | Roadkill | 2 - 2 | 1 - 1 | 30,000 | Season 2 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 20,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 05-14-2008 | Wiley Bushwackers | 1 - 2 | 0 - 1 | 27,000 | Season 2 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 30,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 05-10-2008 | The Crock-Pots | 4 - 0 | 3 - 0 | 25,000 | Season 2 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 70,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 04-26-2008 | Smeenge's Pals | 2 - 1 | 3 - 1 | 34,000 | Season 2 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 30,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 01-23-2008 | Roadkill | 0 - 2 | 5 - 3 | 34,000 | Season 2 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 60,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 01-06-2008 | Thunda Chiefs | 2 - 1 | 2 - 0 | 24,000 | Season 2 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 20,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
||||||
| Date | Opponent | Score | Casualties | Fans | Season | Confirmed |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 01-06-2008 | Dengue Fever | 2 - 1 | 2 - 0 | 29,000 | Season 2 | Yes |
|
Winnings: 60,000 Treasury Spent on Inducements: 0 |
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